If the bus represents you as you navigate your way through life, which part of you is driving?
Who is driving your bus?
What parts of the “bus” do the different parts of you occupy? What do you see when you look out the window? What kind of bus are you driving?
The Pathwork process would ask you to look at a few additional questions:
What’s behind any part of you that doesn’t want the ego to let go of control? Fear that showing your emotions would be a great risk, even great peril? Do you believe that there isn’t that deep spiritual place that can give you guidance? Is your ego is mad about having to give up control — does it like being top dog?
The second question to ask yourself is — how long has this been going on in me? Is it relatively new? More likely you have been doing this behavior for years, perhaps since you were very young. Can you trace it back to the beginning? Maybe you don’t even have a memory to go with the certainty that this age was where it began. You were probably very young, perhaps even preverbal. In that case there is no surprise that you don’t have strong memories. But ask yourself what was going on in your life at this time.
The last question ponder is — are there any consequences to continuing to be in control? Are others drawn to you as you withhold your feelings? And is that ok with you? Or are you lonely and isolated without enough interaction with others? If you want to change, it requires you to do something different, to find out who could be safe for you to share how you are really feeling — and not just reporting about your feelings but sharing them. That is one avenue that you can make that allows spirit to give directions so that your life makes a positive change.